One of our main struggles as parents has been how to inspire young people - A couple of of our teenagers in particular. One of them is just plain lazy, the other one is a hurting teenager - problems in school, often despondent, and at times extremely obnoxious.
You definitely need to have a strategy to encourage teens, and the following are a couple of ideas that we've discovered over the years that we've determined work extremely well. One of the items we've discovered is that it's impossible for teens not to be inspired - it simply will depend on exactly what they're inspired to accomplish. Fairly often, they're motivated to stand against us, pull away, or under-perform. Instead of acting out, they're acting in!
So precisely how can you motivate kids? Here are 3 tips to get you going:
1. Look at just what your teenager likes. The idea here is to notice just what your child loves to do. Don't take his word for it; he'll state nothing matters". However look at his behavior - does he enjoy a lot of Television, play video games, play on the pc? Notice, and write them down - later on you can make use of these kinds of things as offers.
2. Take the goodies out of his room. Underachieving teenagers shouldn't have a lot in their room - it is going to merely be a spot for them to pull away. Computer, Television, video games, and if he's not performing, also his mobile telephone.
3. Quit carrying out your child's duties for him. This is referred to as "learned helplessness" and it's not very good at all. It doesn't guide them to learn independence. Do not complete their homework for them; if you prefer, you can be accessible for assistance, but don't do it. One thing I've discovered about my kids is if I make them do it by themselves, they will rise to the occasion and be very pleased with themselves.
One detail you have to comprehend is that staying an underachiever allows your teenager a feeling of control and power, due to the fact she does not have to worry about the anxiety of failure or meeting responsibilities. She doesn't have to cope with people's expectations. As soon as people begin expecting more of these teenagers, they come apart.
Matt writes articles about parenting and child raising, including Total Transformation and children behavior issues.
